The desire to change is natural but never on schedule. Just like the seasons, things change when it's the right time.
As babies, we unknowingly desire change. We want to be held, walk, eat, play, and do all the growing up things because that's nature. As children our desires change a little and we start to desire friends and socializing. As teens, we desire to just fit in with everyone else, when everyone else is having that same desire. As adults, the desire to change comes with the changes of our own seasons: marriage, divorce, children, grandchildren.
Through all our life, we are constantly going through change, but there is a deeper desire that people have. The desire to change their life and the lives of others.
One of the things I was reading this morning talked about the desires for change when we have a purpose in life. That purpose usually comes from a desire for change when we are younger. We start to see the vision that is our purpose for being on this planet. And if we embrace it, we gain the ability to change others around us.
Sounds pretty cliché. But when I look at my life, and share it with others, a pattern behind the desire starts to show.
When I was 13 years old my family moved from Arizona to Idaho. Talk about change! I had never lived anywhere else. I had never had to make new friends because the friends I had were there from birth. This change in my impressionable years was more traumatic than I realized at the time. But it started the desire in me to be empowered. I had no idea at 13 years old what that even meant, but looking back now, it was there.
Between the ages of 15 and 21 I was all about change. Changing my personality to fit in with others. Changing my style to fit in with others. Changing my hair to fit in with others. Everything was about trying to fit in with the "right" crowd. During those years, I wasn't empowering myself at all. That's where the desire to be empowered got a little twisted. My desire was to be empowered, but only with the right people. Side note: some of those people were TOTALLY not the right people.
At 22 years old, I was married to my first husband. The desire to empower myself to be "the good wife" was strong....and again, for the wrong reasons. We were very young and naïve about what marriage should look like. Needless to say, that marriage did not last very long.
At 25 I was in my second marriage which would be the one to start my desire to empower MYSELF instead of others. That marriage lasted 11 years. In those years I was a very empowered woman outside of my home. I am grateful for the lessons learned in that marriage and grateful that it did not last.
The desire to change usually comes from a desire to survive.
That's what happened to me. Almost 14 years ago, my marriage was over, I was a single mom, I lost my car, and I was loosing my house. I had no desire for anything except survival. I wasn't thinking about being an empowered woman who could take life on by herself. It was all survival instinct.
Fast forward to today. I sit in my office, writing my feelings and thoughts to share with other women because I have finally reached a point where I feel empowered. I can care for my family and friends. I can support other women. I can help them find their desire. I have all these amazing tools that were actually there the entire time.
My desire has never changed. I have always wanted to be and to help others be empowered. I have always wanted a woman to feel like she was enough, to be loved by someone, to be successful, and to embrace their authentic self, no matter what their age. I just didn't know until my season changed.
What is your desire? What do you want to change? Has it been something in the shadows for a long time? Is it something new? Whatever it is, don't be afraid to change a little before your season changes. We don't always have to wait for the snow to melt.