About 4 days ago began deviating from my usual morning journal prompts. I started reading The Purpose Driven Life. If you have read this book, then you probably understand how the beginning can be a difficult read. Not because of the wording or language, but because of the depth at which you begin to reflect on things.

Today, the sentence that stood out to me the most was “live each day as if it were your last day.” This is not a thing I like to do. As a matter of fact, it brings on a lot of anxiety and even physical illness. I can’t fathom it, nor do I want to imagine it.

I stopped reading this chapter multiple times. I didn’t want to think about the end, I didn’t want to grasp what comes next. I didn’t want to have a day filled with anxiousness and depressing thoughts.

Because I have been working so hard at creating better habits, I stuck to it and finished up the chapter. I began to think about many, many things but this sentence kept coming back into the forefront of my thoughts.

How am I living today? What if this was the last day? What have I done today that will leave good for those still here tomorrow? Even typing these questions is difficult and I feel that anxiousness rising again.

So I started thinking of examples of how I am living intentionally, what I am doing to make a difference in my life and in the lives of others. I thought of all the good things: created a roller blend for my friend and her daughter, texted a friend I haven’t spoken to in a long time, spent a nice dinner with my family, supported those who needed it, deflected negative feelings from it’s intended recipient. There were many, many things I have done that have been intentional living.

And there have been many things I’ve done that have not been intentional. I won’t take you through that list.

To make a long story of morning journaling a shorter story, I want to do every day the things that are purposeful, productive, and supportive of the “job” that I have right here and right now. That job is to spread signs, to show others there is hope, and to give them a look at how amazing they are.

This is the easiest job I have ever had.

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